Jokes tagged as Life

16 THINGS THAT TOOK ME OVER 50 YEARS TO LEARN:

16 THINGS THAT TOOK ME OVER 50 YEARS TO LEARN:
by Dave Barry, Nationally Syndicated Columnist

...

What not to say to a cop!!

NEVER SAY TO A COP

1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.

2. Sorry, Officer, I...

Tummy trouble

A little boy walks into his parents' room to see his mom on top of his dad bouncing up and down. Th...

To Be Her Tampon

Prince Charles, 56, will marry his long-term partner, 57-year-old Camilla.
Charles said "I love her...

Trojan Man

Two guys were hiking up a mountain when they came upon some people bungee jumping. One said to the o...

All in the Family

Why did Einstein marry his cousin?

He postulated that men have a special attraction ot the breast...

Priorities

Two teenagers were arrested for possession of marijuana. At the police station the sergeant told th...

Nightmare food

Q: What food kills a woman’s sex drive?

A: Wedding cake....

Stress

Stress is when you wake up screaming & you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet....

Radio Letter

Dear Safety Harbor Middle School:

God bless you for the beautiful radio I won at your recent seni...

Cookies

An elderly man lay dying in his bed. In death's agony, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite...

Joe, the neighborhood chronic borrower...

Joe, the neighborhood chronic borrower approached his neighbor, "Ray, may I borrow your axe?"

"...

Interesting facts

If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound bo...

You know you are in a small town...

- When you don't use turn signals because everybody knows where you're going.

- if you're born on...

What do you call a vegetarian with diahrrea?

What do you call a vegetarian with diarrhea?

A salad shooter....

Pillsbury Dough Boy wanted for attempted murder

A lady named Linda went to Arkansas last week to visit her in-laws,and while there, went to a store....

Murphy's Laws (5)

Never slap a man who chews tobacco.

There are many many more asses in the world than donkeys.

...

Real News Headlines

These are actual newspaper headlines gathered from papers across the country.

Queen Mary Having B...

Short legged...

What do you call a girl with one leg shorter than the other?
Ilene

What do you call a Chinese ...

More Wonderments!

If you throw a cat out a car window, does it become kitty litter?

If you choke a Smurf, what col...