Jokes tagged as Doctor

Cajun Pregnancy

Way down in Louisiana, Bubba's old lady had been pregnant for some time, and now the time had come. ...

Pete

Pete was sitting at home one evening when the doorbell rang. He opened the door to see a 6-foot-tall...

Doctor's Notes 4

I was performing a complete physical, including the visual acuity test. I placed the patient twenty ...

Doctor's Notes 7

A nurse was on duty in the Emergency Room, when a young woman with purple hair styled into a punk ro...

Doctor's Notes 8

A new, young MD doing his residency in OB was quite embarrassed performing female pelvic exams. To c...

Preventive medicine belief

Mary: My daughter believes in preventative medicine, doctor.

Doctor: Oh, really?

Mary: Yes, sh...

I've Got Good and Bad News

This old man visits his doctor and after a thorough examination, the doctor tells him, "I have good ...

The bad and the worse news

A man visits the doctor for a checkup, and after some tests, the doctor comes in with a grave look o...

Patient: My hair keeps falling out. What can you give me to keep it in?

Patient: My hair keeps falling out. What can you give me to keep it in?

Doctor: A shoe box....

Put me into a fighting mood

Patient: Doctor, what I need is something to stir me up; something to put me in a fighting mood. Did...

I think that I'm a chicken

Psychiatrist: What's your problem?

Patient: I think I'm a chicken.

Psychiatrist: How long has ...

What should I do then?

Patient: Doctor, what should I do if my temperature goes up five more points?

Doctor: Sell!...

An invisible man is here to see you

Nurse: Doctor, there is an invisible man in your waiting room.Doctor: Tell him I can't see him now. ...

Will I live any longer?

Patient: Doctor, if I give up wine, women, and song, will I live longer?

Doctor: Not really. It w...

Purchasing the brain

A client of a hospital where they made brain transplantations asked about the prices. The doctor sa...

A Jewish boy was walking with his girlfriend...

A Jewish boy was walking with his girlfriend on the grounds of his father's house. His father was a ...

Doctor Bumblings!

Actual writings on hospital charts by Doctors:

1. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her hu...

The Honeymoon Begins.

A guy out on the golf course takes a high speed ball right in the crotch. Writhing in agony, he fall...

Bottle fed baby?

A woman and a baby come into the doctor's office. She is taken into an examining room and waits for...

The 3 shrinks!

While attending a convention, three psychiatrists take a walk. "People are always coming to us with ...