Jokes tagged as Automotive

Cajun Pregnancy

Way down in Louisiana, Bubba's old lady had been pregnant for some time, and now the time had come. ...

The Horn

Q: Why'd the blonde have lipstick smeared on her steering wheel?

A: She tried to blow the horn....

A lawyer was driving his big BMW...

A lawyer was driving his big BMW down the highway, singing to himself, "I love my BMW, I love my BMW...

Amazing talking cow

A man's car stalled on a country road one morning. When the man got out to fix it, a cow came along ...

Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back?

Q: Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back?

A: From crawling across the street when...

Driving home very drunk

It seems a gentleman had too much alcohol at a party, was heading home, and was pulled over by a sta...

The reason for running

A police officer attempts to stop a car for speeding and the guy gradually increases his speed until...

Charged for speeding

A man was speeding down a Alabama highway, feeling secure in a gaggle of cars all traveling at the s...

Explaining his claim

A farmer who's been involved in a terrible road accident with a large truck ended up in court fighti...

Blonde paints the porch

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started can...

Mileage

A blonde wanted to sell her old car, but nobody wished to buy a car with 250,000 miles on it. So, sh...

Blonde paint job

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started can...

The Smashed Kitty!

Seems a guy was driving for hours through desolate country when he passed a farmhouse, and before he...

The traffic ticket.

A New Yorker was forced to take a day off from work to appear for a minor traffic summons. He grew ...

How to get out of anext speeding ticket!

A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:

Officer: May I see...

Bashing Blondes...part 3!

Q: What is every blonde's ambition in life?
A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

Q...

Carpooling

For the second time in a row, I was forced to impose on the woman with whom I carpooled to our child...

Not a good comparison!

A young boy had just gotten his driving permit. He asked his father who was a minister, if they coul...

Eye Doctor

A Japanese man went to the eye doctor. The optometrist said to the man, "Sir, I believe you have a c...

A new car.

One day a mother and father were having sex and their son walked in.

"What are you doing, the ki...